I Should Have

Have I mentioned I’m still in my quarter-life crisis? I’m already 30 and seems like I’m stuck. I have no idea where the road will lead me. I’m just taking the path and flowing with the current. Honestly, I’m envious-jealous or whatever you call it with my colleagues, friends and what not. Checking my Facebook fred shows how exuberant and successful thely are. It made me anxious, covet what they have and what they have reached. Not really healthy on my mental aspect. Adding my current depressive state, it makes me go crazy. I then decided to stop looking at it, not entirely shutting it down. It made me realized a bunch of things that I should have done when I was a bit younger. Early to mid 20’s was my peak period and I realized I should have taken the chance to do things I should have done.

One, I should have travelled when I was youger. Should have met and created acquaintances when everything was seasonable. Two, I should have worked out early on. Humans are naturally attracted to good aesthetics, we vaue physical attraction at the onset. Now, I’m getting difficulties and challenges to meet this goal. Three, I should have said yes to Mark. Pretty simple, I was that finicky bitch. I know I have wrote about him. Now he’s the one that got away. Four, I should have taken time educating myself and learned new technology. During my early work years, I was too complacent of what I have. Now, I realized how new education and keeping up with technology is important to sustain your professional streak. Five, I should have worn protection. Me testing as HIV positive is no longer lingering in my mind. The question now is, what if. What if I wore protection. Perhaps 90% of PLHIV will agree their lives have been changed after testing positive. What if not. What will be situation like? 
Bottom line here is regret. I know it is never too late for these things. Catching up maybe an easy thing to do but the only factor that’s changing here is time. I am behind by 10 years and trying my best to follow suit. But when you’re too tired to think of anything, it’s a different story. I now hold the meaning of “do what you want”. In a nice way of course. Live while you’re young. Go travel, meet as many people as you want, quit the job that you hate and choose your boss. And most importantly, use protection. We don’t want to hear a point of no return.

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The Blame Game

HIV infection rate in the Philippines is growing and the blame game is ongoing, the government who lacks will to mitigate the crisis, the person involved for being risky or the exponential evolution of technology which places everything within reach.

You can’t really pinpoint something just to cover other else’s shortcomings. The Philippine government is slowly catching up when it come to prevention and information dissemenation. They have provided a straight up insurance for PLHIV thru Philhealth, they do information campaign, though not enough. The person behind the risky acts? Simple, they aren’t fully informed and well educated on the things they do. The solution? Fully accessible information, open mindedness, and acceptance. A system that will empower an individual to get tested. This is already enforced by local groups such as Love Yourself and the like. Technology is constant, it rapidly changes every year. You put the blame why a person has been infected because of Grindr or Tinder. Internet and technology is already a necessity. 

These three take part in preventing the undoable situation. It all boils down to proper information at hand. When you’re fully equipped with facts, figures, and details, use technology in a proper sense, risk will be minimized. Girl, you can search your crush’s name in Facebook, what more researching about HIV. Meeting someone in the 70s or 80s in a disco, bar, pub or parking lot doesn’t have much difference meeting someone in Grindr, Tinder or Facebook.

If John is unaware of the risks of having online encounters, it can be easily known through internet. If John doesn’t have an internet, government comes in. If John knows it will be safer to use protection during online hook ups, risks are greatly reduced.

You can’t blame one. Everyone takes part of thr HIV figures the Philippines currently have. The freedom of meeting someone online for hookups is all yours. You just have to know the risks involved, how to minimize it and who are your resources when it comes to proper and correct information, and that includes you.

I know there are different views on this. But the goal is just the same, saving those risky behaviours from HIV, promoting safe encounters, and placing extra care, assistance and support to those who have it.

Related article from Rappler

http://www.rappler.com/newsbreak/in-depth/173761-orgy-tinder-social-media-sex-hiv-aids-youth-philippines